Finally, a book that transforms the human experience! In this book, you’ll discover how ordinary people overcame life’s greatest challenges and lived to become thankful for them. If your heart has been broken and it seems impossible to mend it, there is hope. If darkness seems to surround you, there is hope. If no one seems to understand your pain, there is hope. The stories inside this book are truly amazing. Discover why many are calling “Thank God I…” the most significant contribution to the spirit of humanity in centuries.
“Thank God I…” Vol. 1 includes an introductory chapter by Dr. John Demartini, “Gratitude: The Way to Experience Love and Fulfillment in All Seven Areas of Life.”
Mabel is one of the contributing authors and her chapter is
“Thank God I Left My Kids.”
“Thank God I…” was the Amazon Inspirational Best Seller for 2 days.
TABLE OF CONTENTS 1
*Gratitude: The Key to Experiencing Love and Fulfillment*
Dr. John Demartini (featured in The Secret)
*Thank God My Mother Died*
John Castagnini (Founder & CEO of Thank God I)
*Thank God I Left My Kids*
*Thank God My Husband Died*
*Thank God My Husband was an Alcoholic*
*Thank God I had Breast Cancer*
Thank God I had a Liver Transplant
Thank God I Was Let Go Of My Job
Thank God I Had a Catastrophe
Pierette Dominica Simpson
Thank God I Came from a Dysfunctional Family
Thank God I Love Being Me
Thank God I had a Miscarriage
Thank God For Accidents
Thank God I Had Breast Cancer
Thank God I Multi-media Book
The first thing I did when I decided to accept the invitation to write this chapter was to check if it was spiritually correct. The second thing was to get approval from my kids. This is a somewhat delicate subject, and I didn’t want to hurt their feelings. As it turned out, my oldest son, Jonathan, now 24 years old, responded, “Mom, if this is going to help you be more out there and create more opportunities to share your message with people, go ahead. I’m okay with it.” Lyonel, who is 19 years old, said, “Mom, it’s sad. But go ahead. I’m okay.”
I believe this is a great opportunity to share how sometimes things that we may consider “wrong”, “incorrect”, or “bad” can be right for us and our loved ones, but we don’t know it until after the fact.
When I separated from my husband, back in 1998, he told me he wanted to stay in the house with the kids. I didn’t personally know nor had every heard of any woman who had done such a thing. Usually, the mother stays with the kids in the house and the husband is the one that leaves. When my husband told me about his plan, I was outraged and extremely upset. How could he propose such a thing? I had been so good to him. I am an accountant by profession, and had always helped him financially and supported him so that he could do and be whatever he chose.
Fortunately at the time I was already practicing Ho’oponopono, which I now teach. This is a very ancient Hawaiian art of problem solving that teaches us how to “clean” and “erase” old memories or programs which attract certain things that don’t work for us to our lives. When we engage in this process of cleansing, we allow what is perfect and right to come to us at the perfect time. It is important to understand that we don’t know what is perfect and right for us, or when the perfect moment is. The problem often is that we don’t know that “we don’t know”. However, as soon as I started my “cleaning” and “erasing” (Ho’oponopono) the following thought came to me: “He is actually helping me. He doesn’t know it consciously, but he’s helping me. I needed to be by myself and be out there in order to do what I came to do.”
At the time, this was a very novel and scary thought, but, because I was doing my “cleaning”,
I trusted and decided to let go, and let God.
Shortly thereafter, I realized it was the perfect thing for everybody. My kids got closer. They became good friends and cared for each other, something they had never done before. Before I left, they fought and put each other down constantly. Now, they became more responsible. They also got closer to their father and were a great source of company to him. As a matter of fact, they helped him through a transition that otherwise would have been really hard. In the end, my decision to leave worked for everybody. But did I know that at the time?
When situations are present in our lives, it is very easy to see them as problems, tests, or punishments, instead of blessings and opportunities. The first thing we usually do is judge. We have opinions, and tend to think that we know what is right and what is wrong. Through my experience with my family and countless others, I have learned that GOD knows what is right for us, and, that if we get out of our own way, we tend to “miraculously” be in the right place at the right time.
Of course I felt fear when I left my marriage of more than twenty years. I was leaving my husband and my children, starting a new career, and signing a lease where I took on a huge responsibility without any financial backing. Fortunately at that time faith and confidence in myself allowed me to act in spite of my fear. An inner voice told me that I could do it, but this security did not come spontaneously. I acquired it by working on myself-reading books, taking seminars, and daring to face and accept the things that I needed to change. By trusting in the universe, I was willing to feel the fear of the unknown and do it anyway.
I remember that the first time my mother came to visit from my birthplace, Argentina, she asked, “Mabel, I don’t understand. Are you abandoning them?” My response was, “Mom, I know this is not what we learned as the “right thing” to do, but don’t you see they’re fine?” Her response was, “Yes, but I don’t understand. Don’t they suffer?” She was also worried because they didn’t call me, and I would tell her, “Mom, that’s a good thing. It means they’re okay.” They always called me if something was wrong.
I never set up visiting days or times. They only saw me if they could and wanted to. I gave them no guilt trips. I always asked them, “Does this work for you?” This way, they learned to ask that question to themselves and to others. I also told my sons that I loved them no matter what. I explained that my love didn’t depend on what they did or didn’t do, or on their behavior. It didn’t depend on whether or not they got a college degree. They opened their eyes wide and looked at me as though I was telling them the strangest thing they had ever heard in their lives.
At the time I left, I could have never imagined a relationship like the one I have with my kids now.
My oldest son, Jonathan, calls me everyday to tell me that he loves me. He says I’m on his best friend list! With my actions, I taught them it is not selfish to put ourselves first. I showed them that they could be themselves and be happy and okay just the way they are. The truth is that, without self-love, we cannot love anyone else. By refusing to accept this, we deceive ourselves and others. It is essential to learn to love and accept ourselves exactly the way we are. It doesn’t work to do things for others. If something doesn’t work for us, it won’t work for anybody else. Especially as mothers, we tend to believe that we must relinquish what is important to us and sacrifice for our children. However, the best gift we can give our children is to love ourselves.
With our example, they can learn to love themselves. When we are in the correct place, we allow others to be in their correct place. The more we try to obtain love by doing things and behaving in certain ways for others, the more we distance ourselves from the possibility of experiencing the very thing we so desire.
I now know that my decision showed my children that it is important to do what works for us, because that usually ends up working for everybody else. When we dare to follow our dreams and go through our fears, we reach the other side of the tunnel and see the light. We then recognize what is true and, not only do we feel triumphant and very happy with ourselves, but we also look back and see that the journey wasn’t as terrible as we had imagined. When we stop attaching ourselves to the result and worrying about situations, abandon the need to have opinions and pass judgment, and become aware that we know nothing and surrender and accept the process of life, then, and only then, can we experience the flow of the universe. At this point, everything starts to happen, and things come to us in the easiest way. I often tell my children that “their job is to be happy”. When you are happy, things just come to us effortlessly.
Until I started my process of self transformation, I lived my life trying to be perfect, the perfect mother, the perfect spouse, the perfect accountant. What a relief it was to find out that I didn’t need to be perfect. When I left my kids, for the first time in my life, I was able to love and accept myself just the way I was. I came to understand that we must learn to be happy and enjoy every moment of our lives, without stressing over what others think of us. The most important thing is what we think of ourselves. Love towards our own being is the most powerful tool of transformation. Love begins with us. It is useless to look for it elsewhere because we can only experience it if we have it within. Unless we love and accept ourselves unconditionally, we cannot love truthfully. We say we do, but we love possessively. We don’t allow others to be themselves. Our children learn this and become slaves of our thoughts, opinions and perceptions. I was brought up in this tradition and became a people pleaser. I needed to know that people liked me. I now know that, if I hadn’t had enough self love and trust I would have never been able to make the decision to leave my family. I would have put other people’s ideas and approval first, and, although unhappy, I would have stayed married. I would have become an angry mother and made my kids’ lives miserable. Fortunately, I faced my fears and chose the path that taught my kids to follow their heart and be themselves. In my case, it was essential to show them how a person can change no matter their age, sex or religion. I remember that when we started the TV show, we tapped it at home, and my son Lyonel would help. He often came to me and said, “Mom, I am so proud of you.” What else could I have asked for?
The only thing our kids need to know is that we love them and accept them just the way they are. They must know that we are grateful they are in our lives. Many people say our kids are our gurus. I believe that we definitely have been with them in other lifetimes, and they only come to give us one more chance. They give us the opportunity to take 100% of the responsibility. Our children come to teach us something, not the other way around.
In Ho’oponopono, we use two very important tools for transformation. These are “thank you” and “I love you”. When we repeat any of these, we erase, clean and let go of the memories that don’t serve us anymore and allow inspiration to enter our lives with the perfect ideas and solutions to our problems. The best thing is that, while we are erasing and cleaning, whatever gets erased from us gets erased from our families, relatives and ancestors as well. That is why things start changing without you having to be present. We definitely affect relationships in ways our intellect cannot understand.
Remember. Our kids don’t listen to us. They observe us and learn from our example. I was glad they were able to see the differences between their father’s path and mine, not because one was wrong and the other was right, but because they had the possibility to see and decide what works for them. My decision to leave my kids helped us all grow in ways that I could have never imagined. Our negative judgments and opinions of situations and events have to do with our own insecurities. Our fears do not allow us to know who we are or understand the power we have to attract all that is perfect and correct to our lives. When we trust and believe in ourselves, we recognize that every moment is perfect.
Mabel Katz is the author of “The Easiest Way.” Solve your problems and take the road to love, happiness, wealth and the life of your dreams. Her passion is sharing the power people have to change their lives. She host her own TV show “The Mabel Katz Show” and travels around the world “waking people up” with her lectures and seminars. Mabel is president of Your Business Inc., were as a business consultant she helps others create successful businesses. For more information please visit www.mabelkatz.com, www.themabelkatzshow.com or www.businessbyyou.com